승이, 힘내세요! Please.

It's funny how one occurrence can make the rest of the initially okay day become disheartening. You'd say that it's the circle of life and everyone faces it sooner or later. I know that. Still, I feel so down right now. The smiles and laughter I had in class earlier today are just by gones now. At least, that's how it seems to me for the rest of this unfortunate day. ㅠㅠ I'm so sad right now. It isn't related to my own family or relatives or friends but the person involved is very dear to me.

You know how much of a BEAST's fan I am, right? That's my #1 group. Even though I love all members so much, I have a favourite member and it's Jang Hyun Seung. And it's his father who passed away today. He had a heart attack.

According to reports, the whole Jang family was taken aback by the sudden passing because the father was healthy and no symptoms were shown. It was said that Seungie (the nickname I affectionately call Hyun Seung as) was in the state of shock. The rest of BEAST members cancelled their scheduled activities for the day to join in the mourning. Being an idol singer who lives with his group members and not his family, Seungie hadn't been seeing his father so often. Plus, he's been extremely busy with work like the other members. One of the occasional meetings between Father Jang and Son Jang that fans were aware of was when BEAST's fathers made a surprise appearance on a talk show that BEAST guested on. I remember thinking that Seungie looks like his father. Even my dad saw them and agreed. I also thought that Father Jang was quite a good dancer after seeing the fathers dance to a BEAST's song during the show. Ah! The sad feeling is coming back to me! ㅠㅠ I'm really worried. It's not that I don't believe in Seungie's willpower and perseverance. In fact, I'm confident of how persevering he can be. But having to cope with a family member's death, especially a father's, is not even close to easy no matter how you look at it. Now, Seungie has to continue to persevere and move on with his mother and younger sister. BEAST is getting busier as a sought-after group of singers. I don't want Seungie to feel overwhelmed. Just be strong and stronger, Seungie! ㅜㅜ

I got the news once I got back from campus. As I was entering the car while still at campus, I received a news notification. I could only read part of the title preview that read something like "BEAST cancels activities after Jang...". I knew it was about Hyun Seung because that'a his family name but I couldn't read the rest of the news yet at that time. I was quite in a rush to go back because the weather was turning dark all of a sudden. It was sunny earlier on. In the middle of my journey back home, it rained heavily. Water puddles on the road are always a challenge when driving in the rain, especially for a driver like me who doesn't like to go slow for too long. Impaired view is another. Of course, extra care needs to be taken since the road is slippery.

When I reached home, I checked the related news and my jaw just dropped. "...Jang Hyun Seung's father passed away.." ㅠㅠㅠㅠ I don't personally know him even though I'd always wanted to meet him. However, I felt really sad. I told my family members about it. They were surprised too. Mom tried to make it sound okay by saying that everyone will someday have to deal with such a thing. Yes, mom. But it's still sad. ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

I didn't even feel like updating MYBTOB with new pictures of BTOB (BEAST's junior group) on Mnet M! Countdown. The group was having their 'Wow' performance on that music show as part of their promotional activity. There were a number of adorable and eye-candy pictures but I only posted one, which was a group picture, on MYBTOB page. I live-streamed to watch BTOB's performance. I was so proud of them but no voice or shriek of cheering could come out of me. I just smiled for a while because BTOB did awesome as expected.

God, pour Your love and grace upon the Jang family and the people around them. May Jang 아바님 rest in peace. Everyone, be strong!